How Fear Holds You Back?

How Fear Holds You Back?
September 21 11:01 2017 Print This Article

Fear is defined by Psychology Today as the vital reaction and response to dangers that may be physical or emotional. It is our natural way of protecting ourselves from real threats. When fear starts up in our consciousness, we seem to pause from our normal activities.

 The term “paralyzed with fear” is taken from this crucial pause. Our mind then decides if we should stop, retreat, or proceed with what we are doing. This is the critical stage called “fight or flight”. At this point, we tend to shut down and let our defenses come out.

How it Affects our Personal Development?

Nobody wants to feel the emotion of fear. We avoid it at all costs. We want to stay in our comfort zone and just watch the terrible things that happen to other people. Fear comes with the tendency to focus on what is fearful to us. Frightful things get our undivided attention and we pause long enough to decide on what to do.

Colleen Hurll Counselling emphasized that sometimes scary things and situations actually fascinate us.  This can make our life challenging rather than boring. For example; we like to fall in love, but we are scared of getting hurt. It is said that the path of true love is not smooth, so it can be dangerous.

Life becomes more interesting as we are thrown into a scarier and risky situation. The faint-hearted stay in their comfort zone while the brave and adventurous throw caution to the wind and gamble with what they have.

Courage is not the total absence of real fear. It is the correct way of managing fear that we are able to make good use of it. Someone said, “always do what you are afraid to do”. Getting used to something scary makes it less frightening.

How it Affects Us in our Business?

Fear of failure is common in business. Everything about a business is a risk, and only the risk-takers will ever succeed. Good ideas have been shelved because of fear. Bad ideas have been made into great undertakings only to become disasters because someone took the risk and failed.

One way of making the emotion of fear useful is to align it with something positive. A motivation to do something scary should have a useful goal. Don’t just jump from that waterfall; jump for a cause. Don’t just sell antiques; sell them to support a feeding program. Don’t just go into business; support your workers. Feed your family and give the world a good product.

Achievers and heroes are not exempted from feeling fear. They are just urged on by their worthy causes and their heroic goals. Great businessmen felt the risk they were taking, but they did not choose to stop or step back. They just fought on until their fear slowly subsided and the motivation became more attractive.

How it Affects Children?

Fear in children stems from the disciplinary measures that are too harsh. These measures capitalize on the weakness and dependency of children. As such, their fear is of the unknown and of the loss of privileges like food and support. Children who are exposed to scary situations early in life grow up to be shy and timid. They are emotionally weak and are suspicious of the adults whom they don’t know well.  They are afraid to trust people.

The scary experiences of children affect them in their adulthood. Many psychiatrists can attest to that. As such, something must be done to combat the fears and phobias of these children, so that they will not suffer in their adult life. Professional services on individual counselling by Colleen Hurll Counselling can greatly help them overcome these fears. Aside from that, they need much love, support, and assurance if they are to live normal lives.

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Pedro Byrd
Pedro Byrd

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